Nuptial Celebrations

The Bride's Luncheon

2012-02-13T23:33:00.000-08:00

Custom Totes by Hortense B. Hewitt at Nuptial Celebrations

Traditionallycalled the bride’s luncheon, the obligation is not restricted tothe time of day,with alternatives including brunch, breakfast, afternoon tea, dinnerparty or a spa day.

Theevent may be held the day of the rehearsal dinner, when it isnecessary to ensure that the out-of-townees can participate, or theSunday prior to the wedding, which is possible to be the day afterthe bacheloretteparty. The Bride’s Luncheon may be held at her home, a restaurant,her or her parents’ club, andhosted by herself or a close friend or female relative may organizeit on her behalf.

Thebride’s party is an opportunity to recognize the personal expenseand time given by the attendants for accepting her invitation toparticipate in the bridal party. Personal gifts are usually givenat this time by the bride to her attendants as mementos of thisspecial occasion.

Theladies-only event may include the mother and sisters of the bride aswell as the groom’s mother and sisters in addition to theattendants. A token gift to her mother and new mother-in-lawalthough not expected is one of thoughtfulness which will surelyplease.

Whilethe bride is hosting her luncheon this provides an excellentopportunity for the groom to entertain his attendants, and malefamily members.

Nuptial Celebrations offers gifts for all occasions including for the bridal party and the parents of the bride and groom, friends, guests and anyone you hold dear to your heart in our sub-catalogues of the root catalogue Gifts. Click here to enter the Gifts catalogue.

Wedding Cake Pops

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Wedding Cake Pops by Molly Bakes


Sample of Molly Bakes Products

The wedding cake has seen many changes in the past quarter century from artificial cakes and fruit cakes to cupcakes and now the latest Wedding Cake Pops..
When we were married thirty years ago, we used an artificial cake displayed with fruit cake cut up and given away as part of the favors for the single girls. They were to sleep on this piece of cake and whom ever they dreamed about that is who they would marry.
Along came flavoured cakes - no more fruit cake, that was a great step forward for the wedding cake with much creativity into the presentation from water falls, brides with stairs featuring the wedding party dolls wearing the matching coloured dresses as the bridesmaids.
Followed by the cupcake which has been a big hit, as they are easy to eat, and for the DIY bride easy to bake.
Now, Molly Bakes of London Fields, UK has introduced the Cake Pops, featured here in White with her wedding designs, but available in many designs. For our UK brides she offers classes on how to make your own Cake Pops. Her cake pops are Lady Gaga approved.
With Lady Gaga's TV appearance for an interview, Molly Bakes was asked to design a Lady Gaga Cake Pop to be presented during the interview. Thumbs up were given and the excitement continued that she shared the Cake Pops with her fans.
Learn to make your own Cake Pops whether its for the wedding, bridal shower, birthday or other special event by taking classes if you're in the UK or purchasing the book offered in hardcover as well as the Kindle edition. Click here to go to Molly Bakes website to order yours now.

Weddings Under $1000

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Hands

We have worked with several couples in organizing a wedding under $1000.00. This type of wedding is successful when the purpose is to celebrate with family and friends the union of two special people who cannot afford a wedding and there are no funds available from outside sources.

Scenario One:

The first couple were planning to get married by the local justice of the peace and go out for dinner afterward to celebrate with their witnesses. As other family members became aware of the celebration they wanted to attend the ceremony and the dinner and were willing to pay for their own meal. Subsequently, arrangements were made with a local restaurant which had a pasta buffet on Thursdays, which also happened to be the only day in their region weddings were performed at City Hall, and a disc jockey did play at the restaurant after 9:00 p.m.

Just under 100 people attended this wedding. The guests paid for their food at $15.98 per person plus tax and gratuity; plus they paid for their own beverages.

Invitations printed off the computer were sent listing the cost of the buffet and advising it was a cash bar, and requesting "Best Wishes" only.

The Groom wore a suit, and the bride wore a simple white dress purchased by her mother as the Bridal Shower Gift.

Favours were handed out by the bride and groom - homemade and packaged by the bride - individual chocolates.

Scenario Two:
The next couple choose one of the chapels in Niagara Falls, Ontario where they were married by a minister in a secular service.
The groom wore a suit which he owned - the only cost to him was dry cleaning.
The bride purchased a new white dress which could be worn again - under $200; she owned shoes and accessories which were suitable for the occasion.
Pictures were taken by family and friends in attendance, flowers at the chapel were provided by the chapel.
The small gathering of 20 attended a local restaurant for dinner following the ceremony whereby all paid for their meal and beverages.
Once all the pictures were completed and the enjoyment of the celebration with family, the friends adjourned to the couples honeymoon suite for a celebration, where refreshments were provided by the couple.
Invitations were by word of mouth by the bride and groom, with no favors presented.

Scenario Three:
The couple were married in their home in the presence of their family by the bride's family minister. The groom wore a suit and the bride wore a simple wedding dress.
A celebration in their honour was hosted by the bride's mother at a local hall, at a later date. Food was homemade by the bride and groom's immediate family. There was a cash bar. A family member was the disc jockey for the evening.
Decorations were kept to a minimum - single use cameras, tea lights and confetti with homemade floral arrangements as the centre pieces. Pictures of the bride and groom were on display from birth until their marriage.
Attire was casual. The bride wore capri pants with a summer top and the groom wore Bermuda shorts with a Golf style t-shirt.
Invitations printed by the printer were mailed with the request of "Best Wishes" only.

Scenario Four:
Consultations with other couples for weddings under $1000 included Vegas for 4 days - just the couple - with a family party upon their return, at the bride's parents' home; and the second couple the parents and witnesses attended with them with the party at their home upon their return.
In both instances the couples counted the trip to Vegas as their honeymoon and were considering the cost of the wedding to be the cost of the clothes for the actual ceremony plus the reception upon their return.

Alternative Suggestions:

When you keep it simple and under 50 people you can entertain at home with food and alcohol in the $300 - $500 range for a 4 hour reception. Allocating the balance of your budget to areas you find most important to you. If you do not have at least 2 washrooms when entertaining 50 people, you may wish to consider renting a Port-a-Potty - or you will find people using your garden for their business.
We don't always get to have our Dream Wedding in its entirety as compromise is a fact of life when we are faced with budget limitations, so choose the elements most important to you in your vision when allocating your funds, and you can still make it a memorable day within your budget, whether its $1,000 or $100,000.

Defining the Celebration

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Jonathan and Aimee - June 24, 2010

Understanding Wedding Terminology will assist you in utilizing Our Tools - The Wedding Worksheet, The Budget and the Dream Wedding.

ChoosingTheStyle of The Wedding

Choosingthe style of the wedding, should take into consideration the comfortzone of the bride and groom, as well as their respective families andtheir close friends.

Thesize, formality and atmosphere of the reception should reflect thecouple’s personal taste and budget, and the formality of theirceremony.

Formal vs Very Formal
Weddingsof this type are more apt to follow tradition and etiquette with lessroom for flexibility and personal tastes.

Avery formal reception in the traditional style, usually the mostcostly, is likely to feature a sit-down multi-course dinner with achampagne toast, a live orchestra or band, a head table for thebridal party, plus modest to lavish flowers and decoration. The customary time for a formal reception varies from one region toanother.
Aformal reception although carried out on a less elegant scale is alsolikely to include live music and a planned meal.
Weddinginvitations set the tone for guest’s expectations and for a formalor a very formal wedding will be more elaborate. Engraving aprocess whereby the letter and design is etched into a block orsurface and used for printing. It is the most formal andtraditional form of printing, and the most expensive. Thereception card will be separate from the ceremony invitation, and theinvitations will include tissue paper, and inner envelopes. Thermographyprocess producing raised lettering with a slightly shiny finish andraised texture, is the number one choice for wedding invitations, isquicker than engraving and half the price.
Thewedding dress will be a gown cut from rich fabric, such as satin forwinter or silk chiffon for summer. The skirt can be full andinclude a train. The longer the aisle the bride will walk, thelonger the train can be.

The chapel train falls 1 1/3 yards from the waist and extends 12 to 18 inches on the floor.
The train may be complemented with an almost floor-length veil, called a chapel veil.
To accomplish her purpose, the bride should refrain from adding frills and excessive detail.
A cathedral trail falls three yards from the waist and extends two feet or more on the floor.
To achieve the most formal effect, the bride can cover her arms with long sleeves or long gloves, and wear a headpiece with a veil.
As an option, a long veil may replace the train.

Themale attendants will find Formal daytime wear consists of a cutawaycoat (either oxford gray or black) with striped trousers, a graywaistcoat, a wing-collared white shirt, and a striped ascot.
Formalevening wear features black tuxedos of dinner jackets, black stripedtrousers, coordinated vests or cummerbunds, and bow ties. Forultra formal occasions, the attire calls for black tails, white tiesand accessories. For a contemporary evening look, the men maywear contoured, long or short jackets, matching trousers, wingcollared shirts, vests or cummerbunds, and bow ties.

Semiformal
Semiformalreceptions always include beverages and a buffet of some kind, andmay or may not include live music.
Thewedding dress will be a gown which is floor length or has a trainthat just sweeps the floor. Bared shoulders and skirts of tulleor crisp taffeta are acceptable year round.
Themale attendants for semi-formal daytime wear, feature gray or blackstrollers (jackets) striped trousers, gray vests, white shirts andgray and white striped ties; with a more contemporary approach menwould wear formal suits, matching or contrasting trousers and whiteor coloured shirts. Bow ties, vests or cummerbunds would roundout the men’s ensembles.
Thetraditional ensemble for semi-formal evening wear would includedinner jackets, black trousers, vest or cummerbunds, white dressshirts and bow ties. Warm weather allows the choice of white orivory jackets. Bow ties to match the vest or cummerbunds willround out the attire.

Informal
Theinformal reception includes at least the wedding cake, appetizers andbeverages. Invitationsset the tone. Choose a more casual invitation based on thedegree of formality of the wedding. Offset printing which worksby direct image transfer is the least expensive and least formal ofthe printing processes. Decorative details that makeinvitations look more elegant include laser cuts, embossed designs,lithographs, photographs and ribbons, are used mainly on informalinvitations. Desktop publishing – design and production ofinvitations using a home or business computer is an option forinformal wedding invitations.
The bride’s dress may be floor or ballerina length. A shortchemise or even a dressy suit. If a long gown is chosen,streamlining the accessories is appropriate for an informal wedding. Thewidest choice of gown styles is acceptable for an informal wedding.
Informaldaytime and evening wear, allows black, dark gray or navy businesssuits. Summer choices include white or natural jacketcomplemented by dark tropicaltrousers. Alternatively the men may wear navy blue blazers andwhite flannel trousers, or white suites.

ChoosingThe Time of Day
Feedingthe guests is hospitable and avoids criticism. The cost of thefood at the reception is largely determined by the time of thewedding. However, it is best to use the golden rule, whenplanning the food for the reception, treat your guests as you wouldlike to be treated.
Thetime of day determines the type of food served as well as the cost ofproviding food at the reception. Most guests are expecting food atthe reception and have not eaten prior to the ceremony. Aheavier meal is expected for receptions later in the day. Guests are more apt to leave early and go away hungry when servedlight foods for an evening wedding.

MorningWeddings (before 11:00 a.m.)

A receptionoffering brunch is acceptable. More than twenty-five years ago, the Catholic Church only performed wedding ceremonies in the morning before noon.

MiddayWeddings (11:00 a.m. to 1:00 p.m.)
A luncheonbuffet is appropriate for a midday wedding.

AfternoonWeddings (1:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m.)
Horsd’oeuvres, cake, and punch are best served at afternoon weddingswhen the reception occurs later in the afternoon and prior to thedinner hour.

EarlyEvening Weddings (4:00 p.m. – 7:00 p.m.)
Dinerserved either as a buffet or full service meal is expected whenattending an early evening wedding.

EveningWeddings (after 7:00 p.m.)
Guests areready for dinnertime portions whether it is a full meal or fingerfoods and desserts. Most reception sites have a minimum chargefor an evening time frame, regardless of the type of reception.

Selectinga Menu

Thereare no strict guidelines covering menu selection, the table below isoffered as a guideline only, and assist in your decision makingprocess for the time of day for the reception.

Time of Day	Type of Reception	Reception Fare
Morning: 10 A.M – 1 P.M.	Champagne breakfast Sit down or buffet	Coffee, teas, sweet rolls, muffins, buns, croissants, crepes, quiche, berries, fruit with custard, or fresh cream
Midday – Noon	Brunch or lunch Sit down or buffet	Same as above, plus salads, pasta, cold poached salmon, chicken, turkey, light sorbet, and sparkling wines
Mid-afternoon 2 P.M – 5 P.M.	Tea or Open House style	Light buffet with champagne punch, teas and coffees, miniature sandwiches, assorted fruits and cheeses, pastries, nuts and mints.
Early Evening 4 P.M. – 7 P.M.	Cocktail or food stations, buffet	Seafood and pasta, breads, carving stations, cheese and fruit, wine and champagne.
Evening 6:00 p.m.	Traditional sit down dinner	Cocktails and hors d’oeuvres, three to four course dinner including soup or salad, poultry, fish, meat entrée with vegetables
Late Evening 8 P.M. – ON	Sit down or Station buffet	Hearty hors d’oeuvres or light supper fish or chicken, vegetables, pasta

ChoosingThe Type of Ceremony

Religious
Whenthe ceremony is performed by a clergy person with prayers andblessings, either at a church or other site, it is considered to be areligious ceremony.

Secular
Aceremony performed by a clergy person or other authorized person withno specific mention of God.

Civil

Acivil ceremony is performed by a judge or justice of the peace.

SpecialCeremonies

MilitaryWeddings
Theoption to celebrate a wedding with the formality of a militarywedding is appropriate when either the bride or groom is an active orretired member of the armed forces.
Usuallythe groom and his attendants wear their dress uniforms during theceremony, when the groom is the service. Whereas, if the brideis in the military she has the option of wearing a traditionalwedding gown or dress uniform. Military procession followsstandard wedding procedures, with the newlyweds to work through anhonour-guard arch following the ceremony.

DoubleWeddings
Doubleweddings are more often but are not restricted to be for twosisters. The principle for double weddings provides two ofeverything, including gift tables and guest books. Sisters may send joint invitations; however, separate invitations arepreferable. At the reception, the size of the wedding partiesand available space will determine whether there are two head tablesor one joint head table.

CivilCeremony
Abride may wear a long gown at a civil ceremony, or choose to dressless formally in a suite or simple dress and jacket ensemble. Apopular scenario for a couple to marry at a civil ceremony during theday and invite guests to a gala reception in the evening.

CandlelightCeremonies
Romanticis the candlelight ceremony, however, be wary of drafts, airconditioning, and insufficient lighting. Discuss with thewedding site officials in the early preparation stages.

Weddingsat Home
Ifthe idea is to keep the expenses down, prepare to scale down certainaspects of the celebration. A home wedding can cost nearly asmuch as any other when the couple desire all the “trimmings”,including a rented dance floor, folding chairs,plates/flatware/glasses, chair covers, a lighted tent, parkingattendants, and everything else needed to host the wedding.

TheOutdoor Wedding
Popularoutdoor sites include parks, meadows, beaches, public forests, clubs,historic sites, and private estates. Pick the prettiest gardenspot for the ceremony, and be sure to spread out a canvas to protectthe bride’s dress when it has a train.

TheCombined Wedding-Honeymoon Celebration
Touristboards, foreign consulates, or the hotel where the wedding party willstay can help residency requirement which apply before a marriagelicense can be obtained.
Some couples choose to have the wedding-honeymoon celebration followed by an informal reception within a month of their return, with limited invites to the destination wedding location.
TIP: Weddings scheduled for the tropics between August and Novemberresearch the possibility of a hurricane hitting the wedding-honeymoonsite.
Travel andlodging rates are highest from December through mid-April. Planning this type of celebration, research the followinginformation:

Special wedding package availability
Group discounts available to others besides the bride and groom
Required personal documents (passport, birth certificate, health records, proof of economic solvency, authenticated divorce decree for those marrying again)
Waiting period from date of divorce to the date of remarriage
Widows and widowers may have to present a certified copy of their former spouse’s death certificate
Do any of these documents need to be translated into the language of the country?
Any medical exams required? Do they need to be performed in the foreign country?
Is it necessary to publish banns of marriage?
What are local regulation if they want a religious Officiant at their wedding (e.g. Roman Catholic priest may insist on receiving certification that the couple received premarital counseling)

SpecialTouches to The Ceremony

To personalize the ceremony, churches may allow customization within certain boundaries. To avoid disappointment discuss your personal touches with the Officiant in advance.
Personalization can include but not limited to:
Couples writing their own vows
The bride and groom face their guests while reciting their vow
The bride hands a rose to both mothers and/ or other special guests. At small weddings all female guest can receive a rose as they enter the ceremony location
Fans for warmer weather weddings have become popular. The program can be part of the fan or they can be separate from one another.
Where strewing rose petals are permitted, the bride can walk down the aisle on a runner made of fresh rose petals. An entire case of petals to create a thick, solid blanket can be ordered from a wholesale florist.
While leaving the ceremony, the bride and groom can stop at every row to greet their guests and thank them for sharing this joyful occasion.
Children or honoured guests can be invited to stand around the altar during the wedding vows. A nice touch when it is a second marriage and the children will be living with the couple.
Honouring of deceased relatives. A tribute can be printed in the wedding program, or the Officiant can make special mention of the person, or light a candle in honour of the individual during the ceremony.
At the beginning of the ceremony, the bride’s parents light a candle on their side of the altar, as well as the groom’s parents. The candles burn during the ceremony. At the end the bride and groom carry their family’s candles to the center where they jointly light a Unity Candle, symbolizing the joining of the two families in the persons of the bride and groom.
The groom can return after the recessional to escort his mother out of the church area where the ceremony took place.
The wedding program can feature small photos of family members and close friends with a short caption identifying the person and their relationship
The back of the program may contain a short message welcoming the guests to their celebration and expressing attendance
The couple choose their scripture readings
A family member or close friend participates in the ceremony by reading scripture
Newsletters to keep the family and friends up to date with wedding plans and schedules. This will reduce the number of phone calls. Included in the newsletter are details of fittings, profiles on yourself, your groom – especially for guests who may have not met, and other personal information.

Gifts for the attendants more thoughtful chosen with sincere thanks, realizing most expensive is not necessarily the best gifts.
Incorporating ethnic background into the ceremony and theme as well as the reception.
Cake tops match specific wedding themes and colour schemes.
Providing a babysitter and designated room when inviting children to the wedding.

ThemedWeddings
Themedweddings allow you to personalize your wedding inexpensively.

Colour (black & white)
Floral (roses or lilies)
Victorian
Cinderella
Sports e.g. Maple Leafs
Hawaiian
Dolphin
Seasonal e.g. May Day
Cultural e.g. Scottish
Holiday e.g. New Year’s Eve

Choosingthe Theme
Thethemed wedding is successful when both bride and groom areenthusiastic about the chosen theme. The theme will commencewith the invitations, and can be carried on to include the weddingattire, decorations, activities, menu and beverages Youmay choose to have the guests participate in the theme by wearingappropriate costumes.

Choosingthe Colour Scheme
Sincemost bridal gowns are white or off-white, the attendants’ dresseswill make the single greatest colour statement of the wedding. This dominant colour scheme should carry through to the choice offlowers, table lines, china, centerpieces, and cake decorations.
Theattendants’ attire will also influence the mothers’ attire, andthe flowers and accessories of the male attendants. It is notnecessary to match the male attendants’shirts, bow ties, to the bridal colour – that is purely a matter ofpersonal choice.
Whenselecting the colour scheme, the bride should consider the followingquestions:

What are her favourite colours?
What colours are most flattering to her?
What colours or shade of colour work best considering the complexions and hair colours of her attendants?
What colours are most suitable to the time of day? To the degree of formality of the wedding? Generally, lighter colours or pastel prints are more appropriate for daytime weddings; whereas evening weddings call for vivid jewel tones and contrasting colours, including black.
Will the flowers be available at the time of the year? Flowers that are imported in winter will cost more.
How difficult will it be to match shoes, headpieces and other accessories to the colour scheme?

Ceremony& Reception at a Special Site
Thereare many choices today for a combination of ceremony and reception,which include but not limited to:

Special event facilities (halls)
Private clubs, hotels, and restaurants
Historical Sites
Churches or temples
Home or garden

FamilyExpectations of Food & Celebration
Takeinto consideration family traditions and customs. Whencombining two cultures you may wish to start your own traditions andcustoms by offering a compromise to each of the families’traditions and customs - as a sign of respect.

Guests
Thebudget of the wedding, the reception site, and the type of receptionis influenced by the size of the guest list. Fewerguests may mean increasing the per person outlay for the meal,choosing perhaps a dual entrée instead of a single entrée.
Consultaddress books, telephone books, Christmas card lists, alumnidirectories, club rosters, to ensure no one is forgotten.
Specific considerations in your guest list include:

Pickingand Choosing – Etiquette says invite all or none of the secondcousins.
Childrenin the wedding party and brothers and sisters of the bride and groomare automatically included. However, if you decide to inviteone child, you must invite them all, so as not to offend anyone.
Unknownguests – it is preferable to identify the names of the guest of afriend or single guest and extend a separate invitation to thatindividual. When the escort’s name is unknown it isacceptable to use “and Guest”. Invitees who are engaged andnot living together should each receive a separate invitation.
Specialguests – it is acceptable to send courtesy invitations to specialdignitaries, even when there is little expectation they will attend.
Checkfor duplications – once the families and the bride and groom haveestablished the initial list, check thoroughly for duplications.
Cuttingdown the list – to pare down the list, start with categories –former business associates or casual acquaintances, even friends youhave not seen for years; people living far away, and the children offriends, and although appreciated it is not necessary to invitesingle friends to bring a guest.

TIP: When doing the guest list on a spread sheet insert a column for number of guests, which will be assistance in your calculations throughout. The first column can be the person whom you will be addressing the invitation to which will be beneficial in your calculations of number of invitations required. By allocating a number to each guest in the first column and inserting this number on the back of the reply cards you will be able to identify those who return their reply cards omitting their identities - usually you will receive at least one or two who are so excited they acknowledge they are attending and forget to fill in their names.

Partsof the Wedding Celebration
Describingthe dream wedding that you have envisioned, and then identifying theparts of the celebrations which are most important to you, it will beeasier to identify the parts of the celebration which you willing tocompromise on.

TheCeremony
Envisioningthe type of attire, time of day and year, can assist in makingchoices for the ceremony, location, formality, theme and colourscheme.

TheReception
Location,theme, colours, decoration, offer many choices.

TheMusic
Identifyingsongs with meaning to your life will assist in your choices for thetype of music chosen for the ceremony and the reception.

TheFood
Takeinto consideration personal tastes, family allergies, family customs,and the food at celebrations you enjoy, and don’t forget the cost.

TheCake
Photographedsecond only to the bride, an artificial cake may be used forphotographic purposes, if the cake is not important to you, as a costsaving measure.

What do you want your guests to remember about your Wedding?
Now it is time to take a breathier, relax, and prioritize what is the most important part of the wedding to you!
What conversation at the water cooler Monday morning about your wedding would give you the greatest pleasure? OR the least pleasure?
People do remember the food, the music, if you did things cheaply, and if you appeared greedy. (remember Economy vs Value)
One cultural custom is to take the envelope to the wedding leaving it open, and depending on the evening, they either seal it with the contents in it, or remove some of the funds before presenting it to the couple.
The following article was written by Linda Moore of Nuptial Celebrations for Niagara Wedding Planner offers suggestions on being a Gracious Hostess while minimizing costs.

Howto Be the Gracious Hostess
Agracious hostess will plan ahead with anticipation of her guestsneeds, providing comfort and a perception of generosity. Thechallenge when planning the wedding is to appear as a gracioushostess while staying within the allotted budget.
Severalopportunities are available to provide your guests with a warm andcomfortable welcome, while maintaining a wedding budget.

Accommodations
Responsibilityfor providing accommodations is limited to the wedding attendants;however, it is considerate to book a block of rooms for out-of-townguests. Most hotels offer a discount when booking a block. Enquire about your guests being on the same floor, to eliminatecomplaints from other guests, and allow your guests the opportunityto mingle over the weekend.

Out-of-TownGuests
Agift basket, as simple as a coffee mug and a special blend of coffeeor for the chocolate lover a box of chocolates, awaiting the guest attheir hotel with a note of appreciation provide a warm welcome toout-of-town guests.

Kleenex
Asa courtesy to your guests, provide packages of Tissue by scatteringtravel packs amongst the pews, for those Tears of Joy which are verycommon at weddings.
Awelcome and thoughtful gesture is to provide a package of travelTissue for the Mother of the Bride and Mother of the Groom, as wellas the female attendants.

Maps
Althoughyou have sent maps with the invitations providing directions to thereception and ceremony, your guest may have left them at home, ormisplaced them. Copies may be left at the front desk of thehotel for out-of-town guests, and at the ceremony have a basketproviding maps with directions from the ceremony to the reception.

AfternoonTea – Winery Tour
Whenthere is a long period of time between the ceremony and reception, itis considerate to arrange entertainment for your guests. Delegating the responsibility to a close family friend to entertainthe out-of-town guests at the bride’s parents’ or groom’sparents’ home with an afternoon tea and light snack is a generousand considerate gesture. In the Niagara Region an alternativesuggestion is to arrange a tour of one of the local wineries. When ordering wine for the wedding, enquire about their ability toaccommodate your guests for a tour between the ceremony andreception. When the reception and ceremony are at the samelocation, cocktails and appetizers are popular.

BathroomBaskets
Includeemergency items such as band aids, aspirins, mints, a sewing kit,clear nail polish, and tampons in a basket in the ladies room, with asimilar basket in the men’s room without the female needs,for the emergencies is a kind and thoughtful gesture.

Favours
Beingcreative, while choosing a favour which compliments the style of thewedding and personal tastes of the bride and groom that will beuseful, while staying within the budget can be challenging. Candy will be eaten, a candle will be burned, a sewing kit kept foremergencies, manicure set useful, a magnet will be placed on thefridge, a bookmark used by readers, cork screw or bottle stopperappreciated, bottle of wine will be drank and cookie cutters used bythe bakers. A gift to a chosen charity in lieu of favours hasbecome popular with guests receiving a thank you from the charity.
Thegracious hostess will add her personal touch when making her guestsfeel special and comfortable, while being creative to becost-efficient and maintain her budget, and will be long rememberedas a person of generosity and kindness.

Realistic Budgeting

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Attimes it is tempting to overspend on a wedding, wanting to put on alavish wedding attempting to seek admiration of others. Ideallyit is best to understand the actual costs of a wedding beforeattempting to establish the wedding budget. Weddings are lessstressful when they take place within the means of the personsinvolved.

Budgetingwithout planning a wedding is often a tense situation. Economicrealities of families during the past few years can be causing astrain, or just a catch up situation. It is important to takethese things into consideration when seeking contributions from therespective families. Examples of situations which may effecttheir financial situation include but not limited to:

Unemployment
A failed business
Financial loss due to a lawsuit
Responsibilities include significant medical, legal or educational bills
Another family wedding looming on the horizon
Still paying for the last wedding or major celebration
Conflict about spending the money on a wedding when it could be more useful as a down payment on housing

Economyvs Value

Economyreferring to price, considers a lower-priced item more economicalthan one that costs more.

Valuegoes beyond asking the cost of a service or product taking intoconsideration getting your money’s worth. For peace of mindpaying a little more knowing you are getting your money’s worth iswell worth it, rather than try an unknown product or company in orderto save a few dollars.

Obtainingthree or four estimates per speciality is recommended. When anestimate appears much lower than the others, it is often because thewording used for the pricing is vague or confusing.

Priorto making the budget it is essential to be clear about abilities topay for a wedding, and priorities. Once this is established, wecan commence a rough budget and apportion to the areas where theemphasis is a priority.

Byadding the category Miscellaneous, the unexpected and potentiallyunexpected expenses will have an allotment. Examplescould be long-distance phone calls, cab rides and transport fees.

ContemporaryDistribution of Expenses

Thepercentages below are based on national averages are intended purelyto provide a general range, and are subject to personal and regionalfactors that might cause them to vary.

Reception site/catering	40 – 45%
Music	7 – 9%
Bakery	3%
Photographer	9%
Videographer	5%
Wedding Attire	10%
Flowers & Decorations	9%
Wedding Stationery	4%
Ceremony site/Officiant fee	4%
Transportation	2%
Rental Items	3%
Gifts	3%
Parties	2%
Miscellaneous	2%

TraditionalBreakdown of Financial Responsibilities

Weddingsbring out extremes in people, with the wedding budget lighting a fireunder everyone, posing the question: “Doespaying for something give a person total control over everything thathappens with that money?”

Beginningwith the bride’s traditional responsibility, we’ll then look atthe groom, the parents and the attendants.

Bride

The groom’s wedding ring and a gift for him
Her personal stationery
Her personal physical examination and medical tests
Gifts for her maid of honour and each of her bridesmaids, plus lodging for any out-of-town attendants.

Groom

The bride’s engagement and wedding rings, and a gift.
Fee for the marriage license.
The bride’s bouquet and her going away flowers
Corsages for her mother and his
Boutonnières for the male attendants
Gifts for the best-man and ushers
Lodging for any of his attendants who come from out of town
His physical exam and required tests
The stipend (fee) for the person officiating the wedding
His wedding attire
The honeymoon.

Bride’sParents

Bridesmaid’s bouquets
Bride’s wedding day attire and trousseau
Ceremony site rental
Clothes (their own)
Flowers and decorations for the wedding site and reception (including an aisle carpet or runner, if desired)
Food and beverages for the reception (including tips for bartenders and food servers)
Gifts for the bride and groom.
Invitations and wedding announcements, including postage and any other fees
Musicians
Photographer/videographer
Reception site rental
Services of a bridal consultant
Tenting for an outdoor wedding and /or reception
Wedding cake

Groom’sParents

Hosting the rehearsal dinner
Gifts to the bride and groom
Their own lodging and travel expenses
Their own wedding clothes

Maleand Female Attendants

Theattendants have minor financial obligations as they are serving atthe invitation of the bride and groom, with their financialobligations limited to:

Paying for their own wedding clothes
Their personal travel expenses
Wedding gift for the bride and groom

RedistributingFinancial Responsibility

Suggestionsfor redistribution shifts the burden from the traditional weddinglaid on the shoulders of the bride’s parents to be shared amongstthe bride and groom and both sets of parents.

Brideand Groom

Thebride and groom should take responsibility for a portion of the costof their wedding by paying for:

The bride’s attire and trousseau
The wedding flowers
The bridesmaid’s luncheon
Invitations, Announcements, and personal stationery (thank you notes)
Entertainment and courtesies for out-of-town guests
Honeymoon

Bride’sParents

Itis realistic for the bride’s parents to take financialresponsibility for these key areas:

The fee for the site of the ceremony (including fees for any assistants to the Officiant)
Music at the ceremony
Reception food (including the wedding cake)
Photography/videography
Any site fees (including rental of equipment, tips to the serving staff, and any other miscellaneous items)

Groom’sParents

Itis reasonable to expect the groom’s family to pay for:

Allbeverages served at the reception
Limousineservice
Musicfor the wedding reception

AlternateSuggestions:

Alternative suggestion is to pool the contributions from all sources and open a wedding bank account, which allows the couple to manage the disbursements in an efficient manner. This establishes a maximum which the expenses must not raise. The bride and groom should be aware of the cost to put on their special day.
Friends and relatives who are unable to afford an appropriate gift will often volunteer to assist with the wedding-related chores in lieu of a presentation of an expensive gift. The sensitive couple will thank them and make it clear they do not expect anything further and express their gratitude for the” gift of time and assistance.” OR When a friend or relative is a professional such as a musician, photographer, florist, Officiant, and has offered to present the wedding gift in the form of their services, the couple should consider wedding gift as the services performed by this person. A word of caution when using friends and family as a means to save on expenses by accepting free services: you relinquish your right of control and embarrassing situations can occur. (examples: music tastes may not be the same for a disc jockey's service; or in the case of the cake, it may not be transported properly and may look like the Leaning Tower of Pisa).
Having discussed the budget and allocating funds, most couples will agree they may need some financial assistance with the celebration. When the parents are unable to commit to a percentage or lump sum, they may however, be able to cover some of the expenses as gifts, during the period prior to the wedding. Depending on the amount spent on birthdays, Christmas and other celebrations, they may be in a position to offer to pay for an individual item as a gift. Examples include:

Invitations
WeddingCake
ToastingGlasses
GuestAlbum
Baseand Pen set
CakeServer and Knife

Someitems you may be able to register for, in order to receive the itemsyou desire. Some travel agencies encourage registering withthem, and guests can purchase a gift certificate towards theirhoneymoon.

Inconclusion, before you start booking your vendors and venue,establish a budget, and ascertain who is paying for what to make yourplanning stage a fun time instead of a stressful time.

Ourside pages, The budget, Dream Wedding and Wedding Worksheet will behelpful tools in your planning process. Our next post Defining theCelebration will also be helpful in your journey.

We're Engaged

2012-01-22T07:41:00.000-08:00

He asked and you said yes, unless it is a leap year, and you asked and he said yes! Trailer for Leap Year Movie
Your first reaction may be to post it on facebook or text your closest friends, but you can do this after a phone call to the parents if they are out of town, or an in-person visit to share your good news.
This also creates the perfect opportunity to ascertain who is willing to help pay for the wedding.
Your parents may start by asking questions about the wedding date, place, number of guests; which opens the door for you to discuss money.
It is your wedding and you have final say on all decisions, whether you choose to keep with family traditions or stray into new territory.
We suggest you ask your parents what they envision for your wedding when they close their eyes. You may be surprised and find they have included some of your dreams in their vision.
It is appropriate at this time to ask before we get into planning the wedding, it will make it easier if we know if you are willing and able to contribute to the cost of the wedding. They may need to review their finances and things that will contribute to the ability are their health, the job situation, other commitments, younger children, siblings in school receiving funding.
Weddings can be done for as little as $1000 when simple will do and you're not into tradition, or they can be as expensive as millions - depends on your lifestyle, financial obligations, and your tastes. We will be discussing the budget in the next segment.
In the meanwhile, you want an engagement party, which can be hosted by yourselves, a friend or family member. The main thing to remember when inviting guests to an engagement party- do not invite someone to the engagement party who is not invited to the wedding. Therefore, before planning the engagement party, you will need to plan your budget, and set your guest list.
Guests may or may not bring an engagement gift to the party. Etiquette does not require gifts for this celebration, and if all guests did not bring gifts it is recommended not to open the gifts at the party as it will make those who did not bring a gift uncomfortable. You may also have received engagement gifts from family or close friends upon the announcement of your engagement prior to the engagement party. In this case, the presenter is certainly not expected to present a second gift at the the engagement party itself.

The Business Side of Weddings

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There is so much more to planning a wedding than picking a date, venue and disc jockey that there have been several books written on the subject, and the wedding consultant business has grown substantially in the past 10 years.

During the next two weeks our blogs will cover planning your wedding taking you from announcing the engagement to the wedding day, providing you with information on the various options available allowing you to make an informed decision when Making Your Dreams Come True!

For years you may have dreamed about your Dream Wedding or you could be one of those who never really gave it any thought until now. Close your eyes and think about your wedding day, what do you see? You have taken the first step in planning your Dream Wedding. What you saw was what you hold most important to you about the day. What did your partner see, when you asked them to do the same? Discuss your dream wedding between yourselves and come to an agreement what type of wedding you're aiming to have.

Aguide to assist in completing the WeddingWorksheet Questionnaireand Describing your DreamWedding, the informationis provided with the intent to invite dialogue in the weddingplanning stages. These steps can be extended to the bride andgroom’s parents. During the decision making process byincluding the parents, and allowing their input, with theunderstanding the final decisions will be made by the bride andgroom, all feel they are part of the wedding.